Logan is of the age now where he has to write papers for school. This fast is super irritating as no one has taught him how to do such things. It’s a real trial by fire. He had a couple of papers that he was working on over an extended snow break we had. I’m the de-facto editor in the house because of my excellent grammar skillz. We all happen to be in the car and talking about his progress on the papers when his font selection turns up. See, Logan likes to use Comic Sans of all things. And I make fun of him for it because it’s just silly looking. I would show it to you, but I just found out how annoying it is to try and change fonts in WordPress. I’m just really shocked that none of his teachers have called him on it so far. Surely high school will be different on that front? Maybe they just don’t care in middle school?

So Jason asks “What kind of font would you prefer?” It’s not like I know that many by name, but I throw out a couple. “Arial, Times New Roman, Helvetica…” “Oh, so you’re a Helvetica Girl are you?”

Why yes, yes I am a Helvetica Girl.

Helvetica Girl does do some Lisa Loeb style covers, but also writes her songs dedicated to her literary heroines. I’m sure she’s a Jane Austen fan. She probably sleeps in her car with her homeless mother, plays mostly in coffee shops, and local bookstores.

This one’s a bit embarrassing.  For reasons I shall not explain, I was searching “burrito” on my phone.  But, just like Homer, my fingers were too fat for my tiny phone keyboard.  Hence Buttito.

While I feel this one needs no explanation, here it is anyway: Buttito is obviously a Weird Al cover band with Spanish flair.

Fine, I was searching Taco Bell’s website for the Beefy Nacho Griller because I couldn’t remember the name.  It’s way too much pressure to get up to the ordering window without knowing the name of it already.  Have you seen the menu lately?  So many choices.  I can’t read the menu that quickly. If I don’t know the name ahead of time, I’ll just cave and order the usual.  How boring is a regular old taco with extra cheese?  Delicious?  Yes.  Do I want it every time I make a Run for the Border?  No.  So I risked life and limb to type while at the red light and ended up with Buttito.

 

Jason was watching some ELO concert television show the other day.  I wasn’t really paying attention, they are not my jam.  He made some random comment about how “maybe they aren’t from Baltimore after all.”  What?  “I thought they were from Baltimore, but I think they are from England after watching this.  Maybe I don’t like them after all.”  I paid more attention.  The singer began talking and he definitely had an English accent.  A groan was all I heard next to me.

“What is your problem with English bands?”  was the obvious question I asked.

“You know how I feel about English bands.”

“I didn’t realize your feelings were so strong.”

“You thought I liked bands from England?” He sounded indignant.

I just didn’t realize you hated them so much.  I thought you were just neutral on them.  English neutral.”

English Neutral is an American band that only plays songs from English bands.  Just to spite Jason.  I imagine them butchering Oasis songs on a regular basis.

 

The weather is starting to change here and I am freezing all the time.  It makes me feel really old to be this cold all the time.  I mean, I grew up in Ohio – not the coldest part of the state, but we had our share.  I thought I was used to it.  I actually live a bit farther south now but as soon as the temps start to drop it’s all over.  Yesterday I wore my first sweater of the season out and about.  On my way home, I was thinking about how I couldn’t wait to get home to put on my cardigan over my sweater.  I would then be wearing double sweaters!  You just can’t make this stuff up.

The Double Sweaters are a bunch of retired rockers.  Not literally rockers, but retired people who like to rock.  They formed their band in the old folks home and play for all their fellow prisoners.. ahem..  residents.  Probably on a Saturday afternoon.  Old people don’t rock after dark.